I AM BACK!!!!!

I have not posted for a long time, in fact over a year but a lot has happened in the last year and I will share with you the events. I was exercising and making a goal to get to the gym at least 4 times a week. While I was going to the gym and being diligent I lost a total of 25 pounds....giddy up right????? I started school and continued to do great but stress the lovely devil that she is entered and I began to stress eat while I studied. Chocolate, salt and vinegar potato chips and Pepsi are beautiful study companions. I gained every ounce of my weight back which only made me eat and gain more. I have joined Weight Watchers enough times that I am sure I have bought the owners of Weight Watchers their Mercedes so I refused to join again.....until a girl that I work with began to tell me about how it has changed.

Weight Watchers now lets you eat all the fruit and vegetables you want to eat and they are all zero except the starchy ones like corn and potatoes. I joined online which is also another great thing for me. I hated going in and weighing for other people. The ladies that were weighing me were usually elderly and always saying "Ohhhhhhhhh you only lost 2 oz" or "Was it a bad week dear, you gained 2 lbs." NOT my favorite! They of course were trying to help and be kind but I am an angry dieter so with that of course I would want to spank her for weighing me and telling me I had gained or only lost a fraction of weight.

Even though joining has been a good thing I have still felt frustration with not being able to eat the things that I love so dearly. I have discovered that food is an evil thing and this is why. The food that you really, really, really love makes you fluffy or makes you retain water or some other rotten thing, sure it is lovely while you are eating it and pretending to be your friend you know like the mean girl in junior high that we all fell victim to but there is a price to pay ALWAYS. After eating it we step on the scales and feel devastated like we can’t believe that something that made us feel so good now is making us want to weep. Then we feel determined now we will suffer and eat those things that are not so comforting. We will now eat food that we should eat. Food that we don’t really love or desire and it only makes our stomach hurt, makes us feel cheated, unsatisfied and pissed off as we gag it down a bite at a time....

My goal is to do it this time, no more fluffy Melinda, I have to change and keep it off. I will tell you that even in all of my frustration with not being able to eat all of the things that I super love I have felt better physically. The first few weeks are hardest and I have found easy to give up. I need to make it at least 6 weeks and then it will be a habit and I will see and feel a difference I think.